Praying to begin living again after loss
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Feb 13, 2017 at 4:41 am #3292sandtorresjrayParticipant
I live in Monterey, CA and am having difficulty after the loss of my Grandmother who myself and my boyfriend provided care to for the last 5 years of her life untill she passed (as she wanted to, in her home-peacefully) In early 2016. Before moving in to help my Grandmother by myself I was in an abusive relationship and had just started attending College when I was asked to help with her care. Just finished first semester when she needed 24 hour care. I gladly provided care for her on my own without ever receiving pay because Gmas power of attorney (my aunt) never completed her part of the paperwork. Almost 6 years later I was left with nothing when she passed and am struggling with bipolar disorder, depression, anxiety and suicidal thoughts which I am now receiving help for. My boyfriend of 5 years who helped me with my Gma the last 2 years works 3-4 days a week locally and is helping to support me during my recovery and treatment process. There are multiple possibilities for apartment options but living day to day drains funds rapidly and we rely on transportation from friends (we have no family around) , walking or use public transportation which also is draining. All our belongings and my grandmother’s are in storage which is almost 600.00 a month as well. Any debt I owe is in medecal expenses and he owes child support. I never thought I’d be in this situation for doing the right thing for the woman who raised me and the affects from watching her deteriorate in front of my eyes has proven more detrimental than I ever thought possible. I have 2 daughters that are both being cared for by their fathers and who I’m embarrased to even see since I’m never in the same hotel room or house for long and have nothing stable to show them. I pray to find a medication path that works so I can get back to working and continue school. I feel so guilty that my Boyfriend has sacrificed so much to be in my life and now I can hardly provide. I’d do anything to have a day to not worry about where we may end up next. With us next to Pebble Beach we also experience tremendous rate increases for hotels throughout this year, this most recent weekend being one of them- we took a bus almost 40 miles away just to afford a hotel. Missed a work oppertunity and I missed my daughter ….again. I don’t want to be a disappointment for my girls and not move forward. I would gladly be open to anything help wise- please. I can’t sleep on the streets again and try to get my mind back on track as well. I don’t want to loose my children completley and I have no family to ask for any help. Please email me any options. Truly grateful for your time.
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